I get knocked down, but I get up again....

So I'm not doing so well.

Things are sneaking in. Training has dropped. Excuses are coming out again. I cannot let this happen!!!
I think because I've practically lost 20kgs since day 1 preseason, I've decided that It's such a huge milestone and wasn't as hard as I imagined, that I can relax a little. Silly, silly girl. That's the LAST thing I can do!

Relaxing has caused me to only lose 100grams this week. Relaxing has held me back another week from attaining exactly 20kgs. It's giving me another week less to hit my 30kg mark. I'm now not so sure that I'll make the 10kgs in the next 4&1/2-5 weeks to make it. It's noone's fault but my own.
I've had people living with us who've brought some of the naughty stuff in.... suck it up princess! You have to deal with that stuff everyday for the rest of your life now! It's not a good excuse.
I've had a sick daughter who has been waking alot during the night.... but again, that's what nana naps are for! Or just go to bed earlier!

Don't get me wrong, 80% of the time I'm good. I hold myself back, I train hard. I push myself. That 20% is holding me back from achieving what I KNOW I can do. I KNOW I am capable of it. I could lose 12kgs in the next 4 weeks if I put my mind to it... just like the first 4 weeks of preseason.

If I was still the same person I was 3 months ago, I would have thrown in the towel. "This is too hard." "Ican't do it" "I don't deserve it" "you idiot! You've stuffed everything up now, may as well just pack it in.".

I am not that person anymore. I've told myself off. I know what I've done is wrong. I know how to fix it and I know that I can do it. I already have!

3 months ago, my initial goal was 12kgs lost in 16 weeks. I really thought that would be a stretch. I had no idea that I could lose that in 4 weeks!
I know better now and I WILL get back into it. I will not fall backwards during the 'off-season'. I have come too far now to throw it all away. I've gotten a taste of the weight loss bug. I've started noticing the changes in my own body myself and I enjoy it too much.

The song Tubthumping has come to mind a lot recently......

'I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down.'